Viva Nebraska

The wife and I are going to hop in the car and make the long-ass drive to Nebraska this weekend for a CU alum class-mates wedding. Truth be told, I am not really going for the wedding, but am going because it's a good excuse to see my boy Mike. If you've never met him, the picture at left is a good example of him, only picture this guy hitting on two chicks who may or may not be over the age of 18, an additional cigarette shoved in the mouth, and one beer in each hand.

Juice, I know what you are thinking ("wait, that asshole didn't come to my wedding"). Well, you're right, except I almost died and was laid up in the hospital when you got married. I said a prayer for you two to my God, and it must have worked because your wife hasn't gotten rid of you yet! And mark my words, someday the wife and I will make the same long-ass haul that you did, across two states, to visit you, if you invite us. If not, I would expect the Sports Bottle to invite us.

Anyways, back to my boy Mike. This guy dated some girl whom none of us friend thought was that hot (or cool for that matter), and now she ripped his heart out of his ass and dumped him. So, being the great friend I am, I am driving down there to help him get really drunk and get her out of his mind. I am also hoping to play the role of wingman and help him bang some hot, half-drunk bridesmaid. I am a little out of the partying scene, and it has been a long time since I last "tied one on". I am very nervous about trying to keep the beer flowing as much as my friends, and also my propensity to develop a huge vagina and get really sleepy at 11 p.m. Full update to follow Monday, as I will be exhausted and ready to put off any work. I may even rip off one of Simmons'/Juice's running diaries...