Turkey Day Pregame Spectacular

First, I ought to get my quick and shitty picks in so that everyone can run to their offshore bookies and place bets solely based upon the opinions of an anonymous Internet blogger:

Last Week: 6-10
Season: 68-66-1
All-Time: 202-192-3

GB(-11), Dal (-13.5), NYG (-6.5), Mia (-3), Sea (-3), Phi (-9), Atl (-12), Ind (-3), Cin (-14), Car (+3), Jax (+3), SD (-13.5), Min (-10.5), Ten (NL), NE (+3)

PACKERS

They will kick the shit out of the Lions today. At least 50% of fans will be Packer fans. There will be some shitty Motown act at halftime. I enjoy Thanksgiving Packer games because it gives me an excuse to be a loud asshole, not talk to anyone, and wear a jersey on Thanksgiving instead of a sweater or some shit.

CREIGHTON

Takes on nationally popular Michigan on a neutral court today. Don't have a great grasp on the Jays yet. Not a game they will be favored to win, but they could do it. Will be watching via DVR.

BADGERS

Nice trip to Maui. Frustrated a bit by the Gonzaga game. I think the Zags were clearly the more talented team, but if we make more than 20% of our threes, we are right there. I'm liking Leuer alot. Also, Keaton Nankivil is on pace to break the all-time record for missed dunks in traffic that look incredibly athletic and would bring the house down if he made them, but then go off the back of the rim and land at mid court. I counted at least 4 this weekend. Two really nice wins against Arizona and Maryland that will help the future resume. Duke will beat us by 20.

BEER REVIEW

Leinenkugel's Fireside Nut Brown, Version 2.0. I was assured via radio by the Leinenkugels that they reformulated the seasonal nut brown. Last year's version tasted like I was licking a pancake doused in maple syrup. The year is much improved. Not quite a Fat Squirrel, but it actually does taste like a Nut Brown, and I would buy it again.

Happy Thanksgiving

Road to The Get Together Top 32: Week 12

Rank, Team, Record, Last Week, BCS Rank
(1) Alabama (11-0) (1) 2
(2) TCU## (11-0) (3) 4
(3) Texas (11-0) (2) 3
(4) Florida (11-0) (5) 1
(5) Boise St (11-0) (7) 6
(6) Georgia Tech (10-1) (4) 7
(7) Cincinnati (10-0) (6) 5
(8) Ohio St## (10-2) (8) 10
(9) Oregon (9-2) (9) 8
(10) BYU (9-2) (10) 19
(11) Iowa (10-2) (11) 11
(12) Penn St (10-2) (17) 13
(13) Houston (9-2) (14) 23
(14) Utah (9-1) (16) 21
(15) Central Michigan (9-2) (23) NR
(16) Virginia Tech (8-3) (18) 14
(17) Pitt (9-1) (13) 9
(18) Oklahoma St. (9-2) (21) 12
(19) Temple (9-2) (22) NR
(20) LSU (8-3) (12) 15
(21) Miami (8-3) (20) 17
(22) USC (7-3) (15) 20
(23) Cal (8-3) (30) 22
(24) Oregon St. (8-3) (28) 16
(25) Nebraska (8-3) (26) NR
(26) Troy## (8-3) (27) NR
(27) Stanford (7-4) (19) NR
(28) Clemson (8-3) (29) 18
(29) Ole Miss (8-3) NR 25
(30) Nevada (8-3) (31) NR
(31) Northwestern (8-4) NR NR
(32) East Carolina* (7-4) (32) NR

*= projected autobid, would not qualify without conference title
##= clinched automatic bid

ON THE BUBBLE (HOWEVER UNLIKELY SOME MAY BE):

South Florida (7-3), Wisconsin (8-3), Navy (8-3), Idaho (7-4), Fresno St. (7-4), William & Mary (9-2), West Virginia (7-3), Auburn (7-4), Richmond (10-1), Notre Dame (6-5), South Carolina (6-5), Kentucky (7-4), Texas Tech (7-4), Georgia (6-5), Missouri (7-4), Villanova (10-1), North Carolina (8-3), Arizona (6-4), Oklahoma (6-5), Arkansas (7-4), Uconn (5-5), Boston College (7-4), UCLA (6-5), Rutgers (7-3), Florida St. (6-5)

ANALYSIS

Just a reminder of how this works. Each conference champion gets an automatic bid. And not just BCS conferences. All of them. Top 8 seeds will host regional on their campuses, with the possibility of hosting the first two rounds. Quarterfinals and Semifinals are at various bowl sites. Title game is at the Rose Bowl, because the Rose Bowl kicks ass.

According to the T-3000, it appears that the Florida/Alabama winner will be the number one overall seed barring any huge upset to either prior to the SEC title game. It will be tight between TCU, Texas and the Florida/Alabama loser for number two, especially if Florida beats Alabama. Texas has the built in advantage of the conference title game, while TCU is not interested in making extra cash and tiring themselves out before the Get Together. They will take their two homes games and an extra week off. The T-3000 has been doing this both publicly and not for about 4 years now, so that I can bitch about the BCS, and it has had the same top 2 as the BCS every year, even when all the crazy shit happens in the last week of college football, like is going to happen in the next two weeks.

On a side note, if we have FIVE undefeated teams. Can we seriously stop making up bullshit to defend the BCS??? It is one thing if you are talking about one undefeated against a slew of one loss, or even a slew of one loss teams, on the theory that if you lose a game you can't bitch. But to go unbeaten and be barred from a title shot is a crime. ESPECIALLY, if you are a team like Cincinnati, who might go unbeaten in a BCS conference, and get fucked. Not that anyone getting fucked is right, but the BCS goes out of its way to favor those from big conferences.

But really, it is a perfect system and should not be destroyed.

Upon Further Review

Bummer. I guess I shouldn't start buying playoff tickets quite yet. Our pass coverage probably only gets slightly worse because Kampman was a disaster in coverage. But so is Bush, and probably Brandon Underwood.

Quick Movie Review: "Max Payne"

Fucking terrible, even with low expectations. Plot was retarded and disjointed. Action was OK at best. Worst Mark Wahlberg movie ever. What was the point of Mila Kunis's character??? I'm supposed to just believe that her sister gets chopped up, she thinks Max Payne did it, but he just says it wasn't him and then she just shows up with a machine gun on his behalf? Dumb. Seriously, don't bother. I will never get that hour and a half back.

Short Week = Very Little Work

It is November 23rd. I live in Northeast Wisconsin. It is like 50 degrees out. The weather this weekend, and especially yesterday when I was outside most of the day was unfair. I'm positive I've been to Packer games in late November when it was 10 degrees out. Yesterday I had on a sweatshirt and jeans and could not have been more comfortable. It was awesome. The first half performance of the Pack was equally awesome. The 49ers had NEGATIVE 6 yards passing in the first half. Take away that random 50+ yard run by Gore and we are talking somewhere in the neighborhood of 25 total yards allowed. The Pack did whatever they wanted on offense, including RUNNING THE BALL. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that when your running back, even one as mediocre (at best) as Grant is getting six yards a carry, you should probably give him more than 21 carries. If you can run at six yards a clip, you are impossible to beat. Just another 344yd 2TD, 0INT performance by Rodgers, which is quickly becoming an average game. Sports Bottle is correct about the second half. McCarthy either made no adjustments, or adjusted conservatively and got overmatched by Singletary in the second half. The Niners made it interesting. I hope Harris isn't out for any length of time, but initial reports aren't good. At one point in the second half, the right side of our defensive backfield contained the names: "Bush", "Underwood" and "Bigby". That has 40 points written all over it. Tramon Williams is serviceable, but we are going to struggle in passing downs. Right now, things are looking up at 6-4. I think every game we have left is at least winnable (and losable I suppose).

One awkward thing about yesterday was the pre-game. I posted up at Buffalo Wild Wings at 9:30 a.m. Typically, this is just early enough to get one of the last remaining tables. But for some reason, it never got ridiculously packed in there. I thought, well, maybe the weather is just that good that everyone is outside. But even outside there weren't that many people. It wasn't until we actually got to the line to get into the stadium that it didn't feel strangely quiet. The crowd was normal, so that part wasn't affected. Was it deer hunting? Perhaps. Just was a little odd.

I couldn't convince my old man to come get me before the game, so I ended up getting mildly intoxicated, but having to turn down that last beer. Also, my old man somehow managed to eat a breakfast of pancakes before leaving for the game, then ordered 8 boneless wings (which was all I was able to eat) AND 3 pulled pork sliders with fries. He also had three 23 oz Sam Adams Winter Lagers, which are also filling. It is incredible how much he is able to eat. I felt like I was going to puke when we left BWW and I didn't have the pork sliders.

-The Badgers shit the bed, and as you'll see later, now must win to have any chance at the Get Together.

-I went to the UWGB-Long Beach St. game on Saturday. It was another excuse to drink before noon. The arena was about 1/3 full. Not a terrible game. UWGB lost by 12. The tickets were free. It continues to amaze me that UWGB can get only about 3 to 5k for a game, while Creighton can get 17,000.

-UW plays Arizona at 11 p.m. tonight in Maui. Chances I stay awake to see any of it? 0%

-My OJSFA team, The White Broncos, have fallen to 5-6 after my third straight ass beating. I pretty much need to win out to make the playoffs. I am beyond annoyed by my team.

-I plan to do as little work as possible for the next three days. I used my last vacation day on Friday, even though I shouldn't have to. That day should be an automatic holiday. It is fucking retarded that I have to waste a vacation day.

-It is my birthday tomorrow. Pour out some liquor for planet earth.

Money Well Spent

I'll be completely honest, the amount of "cash" I spent on Mike Sims-Walker was well worth it. The money I spent on Matt Hasselback was not well spent, but I don't give a shit, I knew I wouldn't be picking anyone else up for the rest of the year.

I'll admit I didn't watch as much of the Packer game as I would've liked. And I'll admit I found myself watching the Colts/Ravens game on CBS because I have Peyton Manning. But I've finally learned my lesson. I simply cannot watch my fantasy players. After approximately 15 years of fantasy football I've finally realized my fantasy players suck big floppy donkey dick when I watch. Manning threw a pick and couldn't get in the end zone from the 5 as I watched. This is an intense season of OJSFA. A TV deal is right around the corner. Maybe the Ocho?

The Packers did something all teams seem to do - after dominating the first half they changed their course of action in the 2nd half. Why the FUCK would any coach do that? Get up 40 before you lay down and take a shit.

The NFL is completely fucked up this year. How can the Raiders beat anyone? How does Pittsburgh lose to KC? Brady Quinn threw for 3 TDs in one quarter and he's worse than awful. That makes me feel pretty good going into the Thanksgiving game against the Lions. A Westwood One announcer on the radio last week stated, "I can't believe how bad Cleveland is." I love when the Packers play on Thanksgiving. But an 11:30 game is pretty early for me.

TV review - Dexter - absolutely fantastic show. I just finished season 3. The premise of the show is great and there are a million tiny dark humor moments. I believe there are probably many people who wouldn't see the humor. That's too bad for them.

New season of South Park is fantastic. Cartman singing "Poker Face" is classic.

Video game review - New Super Mario Brothers Wii - fucking awesome. It's the classic Mario game for the Wii, but much more difficult. The best part is that up to 4 players can play at the same time. I've actually got my girlfriend to play with me, bless her heart. She sucks, but she tries. Players have the option to allow another player to play a certain part solo, and she knows when to sit back and let the master (me) take over. Nothing gets a guy some ass more than his Mario skills. Jot that down.

Tar Heel update - a very good, yet young, team this year. I'll predict 8-10 losses this year and probably a 5 or 6 seed. There offense simply isn't good enough this year to allow as many points as they do. But it's anyone's guess how good they'll be by the end of the year and into the ACC Tourney. Y'all will need to get used to the fact that they will win the NCAA Tournament once every 4-5 years. Roy Williams is simply too good of a recruiter. They have a top 5 class this year and they already have three top 20 recruits next year, including #1 Harrison Barnes.

Karl Malone Has Nothing On Me

I thoroughly and completely mail it in every single Friday afternoon. I came in this morning with good intentions. I really did. In fact, I was here by 6:45 am because I was a bit stressed because I had been at a seminar for the past two days. I came to work with a pile of mail and a pile of phone messages to respond to. I plowed through most of that before lunch. Got the important stuff done. And then I ate lunch. And, like every other Friday, I completely lost any desire to do anything.

Not that I typically have much desire to do anything, but by about 2 on every Friday, my brain is toast, I am physically tired, I am looking forward to whatever I'm doing this weekend, and the bosses are sneaking out the back door to begin their weekends.

Also, I occasionally get a random Blackberry messages from my brother that have pictures of a 4-pack of Sparks attached to them at 3:30 pm. I still have no clue why he sent me this picture like 8 minutes ago.

All of this makes it even HARDER to work on Friday. I just surf the web, stare at the clock and try to pretend I'm busy because I sort of need a job in order to make money in order to pay bills.

Friday afternoons were created by Satan (Bear) himself.

Male Bonding

I've got plans to do some male bonding this weekend with my dad and brother. Now, I know what you are probably thinking. But you are dead wrong. We're not going to go out into the woods piss drunk with a rifle and try to shoot something while freezing our asses off. See, even though I grew up in a city that most people that live in cities would consider "the country", I am not a hunter. My dad is not a hunter. My brother is not a hunter. We are city folk, through and through. The closest I've ever come to deer hunting was at the arcade. Or watching a Bucks game. This weekend is the opening of deer season, and we will be going in the opposite direction of all of the dudes in blaze orange.

On Saturday, I got two free tickets to UWGB v. Long Beach St. I'm taking the old man because my wife for some reason "hates" UWGB. We will probably have a beverage or two, maybe some food, probably talk some shit. Should be 3 or 4 hours of bonding tops. It should be a good time. I get to drink, talk out of my ass, hang out with the old man, and not clean/watch my wife clean. I will be missing UW v. Northwestern for this game. I'm going 31-20 UW. 73-62 Dirtbags over UWGB.

Sunday is for Packer games. And Packer games are for drinking (at least a bit). For this one I'm going to try to con my dad into driving so that I can get slightly intoxicated. My dad has to work at 11 p.m., but he's never met a beer that he wouldn't drink, regardless of work/driving. I'm sure he won't get totally pissed up, but he is willing to push the envelope way further than I am. Probably will inhale some Buffalo Wild Wings and drink as much as I can until the game starts. Then I will get forced to drink a few more in the stadium I'm sure. It will work out much better if he drives, because then I won't have to turn down drinks or make a sketchy drive home. My brother is meeting us there, and there is a 98% chance he will be hungover. For the record, Green Bay has done extremely well against NFC opponents in games I've been to. I'm feeling GB 27, SF 14.

OTHER STUFF

I should be more pissed about MJD kneeling down at the one and costing me the game against Ricky (lost by 5).

This post was rambling and incoherent. For that I apologize.

Have fun in the woods assholes.

Picks Quick and Dirty

Last Week: 6-7-1
Season: 62-56-1
All-Time: 196-182-3

Car(-3), Dal (-11), Det (-3.5), GB(-7), Pit (-10), Min (-11), NYG (-7), NO (-11), Jax (-9), Ind (+1.5), Ari (-9), SD (NL), Cin (-10), NE (-10.5), Phi (-3), Hou (-4.5)

I'll probably have more later.

Iraqi Detainees hit soldiers where it hurts most

If there's ever been irrefutable evidence of the effect of globalization, this link to WTMJ's website about Iraqi detainees talking smack about Favre to Wisconsin soldiers has to be exhibit A. Twitter user Bobby O'Shea tossed the link around. Hilarious stuff.

Road To The Get Together Top 32: Week 11

We have our first auto bid, as Ohio St. wins the Big 10. Only 31 more bids to fill. The top 7 remained exactly the same. Awkward. Also, the I-AA teams are gone, probably for good.

Rank, Team, Record, Last Week, BCS

(1) Alabama (10-0) (1) 2
(2) Texas (10-0) (2) 3
(3) TCU (10-0) (3) 4
(4) Georgia Tech (10-1) (4) 7
(5) Florida (10-0) (5) 1
(6) Cincinnati (10-0) (6) 5
(7) Boise St (10-0) (7) 6
(8) Ohio St ##(9-2) (12) 10
(9) Oregon (8-2) (11) 11
(10) BYU (8-2) (13) 22
(11) Iowa (9-2) (8) 13
(12) LSU (8-2) (15) 8
(13) Pitt (9-1) (17) 9
(14) Houston (8-2) (10) 24
(15) USC (7-3) (9) 18
(16) Utah (8-1) (14) 21
(17) Penn St (9-2) (18) 14
(18) Virginia Tech (7-3) (23) 15
(19) Stanford (7-3) (28) 17
(20) Miami (7-3) (16) 20
(21) Oklahoma St. (8-2) (20) 12
(22) Temple (8-2) (25) NR
(23) Central Michigan (8-2) (21) NR
(24) Wisconsin (8-2) (24) 16
(25) Navy (8-3) (26) NR
(26) Nebraska (7-3) NR NR
(27) Troy (7-3) (19) NR
(28) Oregon St. (7-3) NR 19
(29) Clemson (7-3) NR 23
(30) Cal (7-3) NR 25
(31) Nevada* (7-3) (32) NR
(32) East Carolina* (6-4) NR NR

*= projected automatic bid, would not qualify without auto bid
##=clinched automatic bid

I Didn't Get Stabbed

I had my first Craigslist purchasing experience last night. I bought two obviously counterfeited Packer-49er tickets from some dude. I went to his house in G.B., and paid straight cash homey. I brought my wife along as a witness in the likelihood that not only was I being sold fake tickets, but that said "seller" was going to rob and stab me.



I felt like I was going to buy crack or something when I hopped in the car and stopped at the ATM to withdraw $140. It honestly felt highly illegal, and may have been. I'm not sure how the whole scalping thing actually works. The guy had a "website" and claimed to have charged me "sales tax". I dunno, whatever, it cost me $67.50 each for $59 face value tickets. Which is a fucking bargain. Especially on a Monday.



Also, I nearly got screwed by StubHub earlier in the day by buying tickets that weren't next to each other. It was not made clear at all until I was one click away from having my card charged. Fucking assholes.



Buying tip: Try to buy from some shady character with a mustache and Packer themed Hawaiian shirts so you can avoid the ridiculous $15 "service fees".



But seriously, they looked legit. So I'm going to go watch the Pack turn into the opposite of last week again. All of this is like the one advantage to living in Green Bay, and makes it all worth it.