Weekend Preview

Here is my unresearched Packer/Bear Preview.

Packers Running O v. Bears Running D:

It remains to be seen whether Ryan Grant is good like he was in '07, or bad like he was in '08. The line is a question mark, although the fact that Rodgers' jersey was clean at the end of the preseason is a good sign. The Bears are stout against the run, and there is no reason to think they won't be again. Edge: Bears.

Packers Passing O v. Bears Passing D:

This one won't be a fair fight. Not only were the Bears starters a bit shaky against the pass, but most of those starters are hurt. And A-Rodg is suddenly what would happen if Joe Montana, Johnny Unitas and Johnny Utah had a three way (at least according to the National media). Edge: Pack

Bears Passing O v. Packers Passing D

I'm giving the slight edge to the Packers due to Woodson/Harris. And only slight because I have no clue how the new scheme will affect their strengths (can Harris play zone?), and because Cutler has a slight chance of being good. Also, Cutlerfuck could throw 5 picks and be sacked 8 times based on how the D looked in the preseason. Edge: Pack

Bears Running O v. Packers Running D

Forte is really, really good. The Bears line is good at run blocking. Raji is out, and I have no idea how the 3/4 will do. Edge: Bears

Special Teams

Crosby was awful in the preseason. Our punter is average. Our return man is out. Hester still scares me a bit. Edge: Bears

Weather: no edge

Intangibles: My favorite category because it is utterly meaningless. I'm giving it to the Lambeau crowd. Edge: Packers

Coaching: I know Lovie Smith got the Bears to a Super Bowl, but I'm not sold on him. Push.

Prediction: Packers 21, Bears 14. Cutler throws a back-breaking 4th quarter INT that Cullen Jenkins takes to the house.

BADGER PREDICTION: UW 24, Fresno St. 23

FESTIVITIES:

So I'm going to the game Sunday night. I would put my anxiety level at about a 6/10, up from 3/10 yesterday. For reference, my anxiety for the NFC Championship against the Giants was a 23/10. I've been tossing around the idea of getting up slightly hungover on Sunday and heading to the bars to watch the noon games before going to a semi-organized tailgate party. I've already been given that sideways look, and warning from my wife that goes something like: "We can do that. But I don't think it is a very good idea to drink for 7 hours before the game. You don't want to be blacked out at kickoff. And I don't want to have to take care of you either." If I had a nickel for every time she has said that to me in the 6+ years we've been together, I would be rich, and probably would've blacked out alot more than I have. She is right about 90% of the time. We will see I guess. I took Monday off of work.

Black Friday, Blackout Saturday

So I'm coming live to you from an office in a small town near Green Bay, WI. I'm at work. This is on a top 5 list of last places on Earth I want to be right about now.

Dragging myself out of bed at 5:00 a.m. is never easy. But after ingesting 11,800 calories the day before, it is even more difficult. So I need to sit at work while the rest of the world either gets into a fistfight over whatever the newest Elmo toy is, sleeps off a hangover, or gets drunk.

The thing is, I had a crapload of work to do today, and probably needed to come in, but that isn't the point. The point is that there is more than one televised sporting even on in the middle of the afternoon today.

If I were President Obama, the fourth thing I would institute as law (right after the legalization of marijuana, the lowering of the age of consent to 16 and forcing the NCAA to adopt Juicelaw's Dream D-I NCAA Football Get Together) would be to make it mandatory for employers to give their employees paid time off any time there is a televised major sporting event on before 5 p.m. on a weekday. Of course, this would have to exclude baseball (except playoffs and College World Series) and golf (except majors). Otherwise, this wouldn't be that hard to put in place, and would make very few additional days off. One example would be today when there are numerous college basketball and football games on. Others I can think of would be most days between Christmas and New Year's (although if JDDNFGT was the rule, there would be no bowl games on these days) and 1st round of NCAA basketball (which I used to, and hope to in the future, take off for anyway). Those would be the biggies. It just seems fair.

As an aside, Best Buy was PACKED at 6:05 a.m. CST this morning.

But the next few days aren't a total loss. Saturday, at approximately 4:00 p.m., I am going to commence drinking myself into a coma in preparation for Packers/Panthers on Sunday. Either that, or mourning Richard's death (depending on whether he brings up OJSFA vetoes or He). Regardless, Sports Bottle is showing up around 9 p.m., and then it will be really on like Donkey Kong. I imagine we will head down to the stadium district, listen to the hair metal/stadium rock/wedding music, and point and laugh at all the white trash and old people trying to grind up on the random group of hot chicks that is there for the bachelorette or birthday party (this never fails).

I am considering finding a sports bar nearby my house that can get the CU-Nebraska tilt, and watch while waiting for Sports Bottle. But I'm not sure that a)there is one, b)Richard will give a shit or c) Sports Bottle wants to go through the hassle of meeting somewhere.

No matter what happens, it is likely going to be memorable, because Richard never goes anywhere without his girlfriend and doesn't do something ridiculous. This time I bet I'm stopping at Shopko to buy him boxers on the way to the game Sunday morning because he had the pair he was wearing to the bars stolen Saturday night, and shit in the other pair he brought along.

Sunday is going to come early.

Monday is too.