Who's Next? And Other Stuff

At long last, the long national nightmare that was Jeff Suppan being part of the Brewer's roster is over.

I haven't been this excited about a roster move since we were cured of our Yost Infection a few years back. This was long, long overdue, and the delay seems to be more of a product of Soup being a nice guy than a person who throws baseballs. As my high school football coach once said, "You might be a helluva guy, but you're not much of a football player." Whatever, he will take home more than ten million more dollars, partially due to the inconceivable club option AFTER the four years are up, where the Crew has to pay $2 million MORE next year to buy him out. I just got a nice spot on the sidelines and bruises from holding tackling dummies.

The important thing to take away from this is. Who's Next? Who shall take the mantle from Jeff Suppan as my least favorite Brewer? Who shall I bitch about incessantly until he is gone? This is sort of tough. Most of the guys left are sort of likable, and even if they suck (Hoffman) it is hard to hate on them. I guess I will lean towards Macha because he makes some mind bending decisions at times (see letting Parra pitch 2 innings the day before he was supposed to start a few weeks back at Minnesota, and then having to call up your third choice from AAA due to travel issues; also see randomly bringing in Dave Bush to throw to one batter last night, and then pulling him after striking the guy out, which I should add worked, but was really dumb), and isn't all that likable. Even when he says "poppycock". To be determined I guess.

OTHER STUFF

-I thoroughly enjoyed the NBA Finals/Stanley Cup Finals/Brewer game going three way head to head last night. The Stanley Cup was the only game not that close. The NBA series has been almost wildly entertaining.

-The plot thickens on Brandon Underwood's case. Crusin' Chubby's fine name is now linked. I'm sure that two thirty something females met at a strip club from Milwaukee at some time between 2 and 4 am were just innocent, sober patrons. Vegas has just put 1 to 4 odds on these females being "entertainers". As an aside, this doesn't mean there wasn't a sexual assault. Perhaps something illegal did happen. And if it did, then Underwood is a piece of shit. I just tend to side with the NFL player in these cases because I cannot recall a famous athlete ever being convicted of sexual assault, even though many have been accused. Finally, let me point out that I am SHOCKED that at least 7 NFL players in their 20's were in Wisconsin Dells and went to Crusin' Chubby's. Who does that?

-I'm probably going to watch U.S.-England on Saturday from start to finish, and I may even blog about it. I think I would put the total number of soccer games I have watched from start to finish in my lifetime at ZERO. ESPN has finally brainwashed me.

-Finally, this article is a must read. And I'm totally going to order that book when it comes out. As far as you know, I didn't ghostwrite the entire article. As far as you know. For some reason I look forward to four 16 team conferences. Although that just means less automatic bids to the Get Together.

"Just The Tip"

Well, I'm back at work this morning. And I'm just going to go ahead and say that I'm not all that happy to be here. I continue my streak of drinking coffee on a Monday morning after a long weekend of drinking, and regretting it. I sincerely wish I could just take Monday's after long drinking weekends off. But if I did that this month, I would only work like 8 days, which is probably unacceptable to the people that pay me.

ANYWAYS, successful weekend overall. Highlights included:

-Discussing how my friends and I never, ever see each other and not get completely fucking shitfaced. Ever.

-Continuing the streak of needlessly stretching these things out for two nights, and then starting by noon on the second day, just prove that we aren't old yet.

-A surprising number of discussions about kids, landscaping, cleaning and other old person shit, even though only one person has a kid.

-A chip in for par on the third hole by me.

-Open and blatant carrying on of alcoholic beverages to the golf course.

-Mark and I beating "Michael Jackson's Moonwalker", "The Simpsons" and "Double Dragon" on his sweet ass arcade machine.

-Open and obvious drunk driving by a relative of the bachelor, despite the fact that there was plenty of room in the cabs.

-An unattractive waitress muttering the following two things to Sports Bottle: "Surprise, Surprise, right in my eyes." and "Wanna play just the tip later?" Both statements were unwelcome (probably) and completely out of the blue.

-The pregnant bartender at Champion's Sports Bar.

-First trip to the Oval Office "Gentleman's Club"

-(story redacted) at the Oval Office "Gentleman's Club"

-Stiffing the "bathroom attendant" at the Oval Office. I refused to fucking pay to have someone turn on the sink for me. It isn't that difficult. Even though I was retarded drunk.

-A bunch of stuff happening at Cock & Bull which I don't remember.

-The chick fight at that other bar.

-Mark and Richard dancing their fucking asses off.

-Rest of the night was a blur. Remember playing golden tee, but don't know if I finished. Remember eating like two whole pizzas. I allegedly was dragged off of an air mattress onto a cement floor and I didn't even react. Woke up feeling like I was going to die. The End.

PS. Lets do this shit all over again this Friday and Saturday. Anyone? The 4th annual Orenthal James Simpson Football Association draft is sometime on Saturday. The dominance shall continue.