SI Review

I'll begin my weekly snoozefest by wishing everyone a Merry Christmas. Who still needs to Christmas shop? I do. I've pretty much put an end to all packed parking lots, screaming children and long lines. My shopping is done online. Anyways, I'd like to give a happy birthday shout out to (the Sports Bottle's) savior, Jesus Christ. I appreciate you dying for my sins, although I wouldn't be born for another almost 2000 years but, from what I understand, there was a disclaimer that you also died for everyone's sins for the rest of eternity. Dude, seriously, you rock. I don't think I'd have the balls. That must have seriously hurt. But, as David Cross said, why wouldn't you do it? But we won't get into that.

Moving on...

I'm mildly aroused by the cover of this week's edition, and not because they're gonna discuss the "Steel Curtain II." I'm excited about the Vegas related article. We'll get to that later.

(I have the Patriots/Cardinals game on the tube right now. Leinart is just an awkward looking QB. 44-0 Patriots.)

In the Leading Off section we see a picture of the Nebraska women's volleyball team approximately 1.5 seconds after they won some big match. I always find it surprising how similar male and female celebrations are in these circumstances. The only real difference is the shrieking level. But you'll always have the awkward white guy jump (see Phil Mickelson 2004 Masters). In every male celebration you have one of two things - the smear the queer pile up or the large circle jerk where all the guys are jumping up and down in a tight circle. I prefer the pile up. The circle jerk looks completely retarded. The best celebration is the shot of the outfielders in the World Series when the 3rd out is made. They get a good five seconds of isolated celebration before they reach the mound and join in on the ass raping of any given closer.

SI Players NBA Poll - Which team will win the NBA title this season? The results were overwhelming, which did not surprise me. But the #1 choice isn't who I would've guessed. The Lakers were #1 with 67%. The Celtics had 20% and the Cavs had 4%.

Dan Patricks weekly interview - Visanthe Shiancoe. Hmmmm, I wonder what this will be about. Hold on........ Yep, the whole interview is about his junk. Just wonderful.

I've always wondered why I have this pre-conception that the Steeler D is always good. Well, I now have my answer - since 2000, the Steelers have not finished out of the top 10 in total defense. Impressive.

Ahhhh, and here's the Vegas article. The baseball winter meetings took place in Vegas this year. In case anyone doesn't know, Las Vegas is in southern Nevada and is a wonderful place to spend your time, which I will be doing in approximately 25 days from now (there are still openings in case anyone is interested). My crew this year features 3 high school friends and only a few will appreciate the cast. We have my buddy and coworker Petey. But then we also have Worm and Spensley. This, without any doubt, is an all-star cast. Each person has naturally defined roles. I have managed my anticipation beautifully. I'm at about 70% right now and articles like this only help the cause. I'm looking forward to this trip more than normal for several reasons. The last two times I went didn't go well (I have been to Vegas approximately 10 times since 2005 but did not go once in 2008). I got really sick one of those times (self inflicted) and the other time I didn't have a whole lot of money. Money won't be an issue this time. I'll have more money than I've ever had out there. And I will be well rested. I also know at least two of the other guys are big table game players, like myself. And the last reason is my buddy Petey. He's married with kids and was only able to get permission to attend this trip because of all the overtime we've worked this year. He's 99% why Worm and Spensley are going. I may try one of those Sports Guy wrap ups upon my return.

I think Chauncey Billups is a winner. He seems to be the type of player that would make any team better. AI is not that type of player.

Hockey article!!!!!! It's about the much anticipated comeback of Claude Lemieux (I spelled that right the first attempt). I will give a detailed rundown of the article upon request.

2008 Year in Sports Media. These sections are easy to read. 'The Wrestler' is the sports movie of the year. I've heard good things. I guess it's a real life look at some 80's wrestler played by Mickey Rourke.

(Leinart to Fitzgerald 76 yard touchdown. If I were in an important fantasy football game, which I'm not, and I lost because of that, I would be sooooo pissed. It's 47-0 with 6:30 remaining. Why is Fitzgerald playing?).

Other thoughts -

Tyler Hansbrough became the all-time leading scorer in UNC history. Congrats Psycho T.

I have lost all interest in the NFL for the next couple weeks. The Packers suck and my FFL teams are all done. I had a mediocre year in all 3 leagues I'm in. I narrowly missed the playoffs in 2 leagues and lost immediately in the playoffs in the other league. Pretty much par for the course. My FFL prime was around 1995. My interest will pick up significantly around January 18th when I'm perched on the Mirage Sports Book for the NFC/AFC championship games.