Wednesday, December 23, 2009

OJSFA Championship: Alleged Double-Murder Bowl IV

That is just a working title by the way. We could go with "Knife Bowl", "Stabbing Bowl", "Throat Slash Bowl", "Acquittal Bowl". I'm willing to take suggestions.

Anyway, this started out as a comment, but this really deserves its own post. I think what is fascinating about this matchup is the true hatred/homosexual tension between these two. The only other rivalries in this league with more latent homosexual tension are any games involving Duper.

From someone who knows both owners, they are basically the same person. Both drank themselves out of school early, and later returned. Both are assholes. Both drink (smoke?) too much. Both enjoy video games and long walks on the beach. Both are bachelors who are living the dream in their mid to late 20s. Both live in shitty college towns (River Falls and Oshkosh). Both pretty much do whatever the fuck they want whenever they feel like it. Both are my personal heroes.

This rivalry began in 1998 or 1999, at a small to mid-sized high school in Northeast Wisconsin when Bear decided for no good reason to pour nacho cheese sauce all over my brother's hot lunch. This led to a series of threatening phone calls from my dad to Bear, demanding that $1.10 for the lunch ticket. At some point, I believe at my wedding, Bear gave the lunch ticket to my dad. Fun was had by all.

Then Bear had to go pick up Shaun Alexander off of waivers, after Twinkie dropped him (Alexander was a top 5 pick and not yet completely useless), and trade him to my brother, only to have Alexander fall off a cliff and die. This did not make my brother happy. Then, last year, Bear traded my brother Tom Brady 45 seconds before he blew out his knee. And to rub it in his face, after my brother panicked and cut Brady, Bear picked him up, kept him, and he won his 2nd MVP in 3 years. So there is history.

Vegas has put Clown Baby as a 2 point favorite. 265 o/u.

I guess I hope my brother wins, because if he dies, in some sort of weird "I'm my own grandpa" circumstance, I could inherit that $250.

4 comments:

Fuzzy said...

That brought a tear to my eye. I was always hoping that Senior would have physically harmed Bear. Not because I wish harm upon him, but just because it would have been hilarious. The subsequent lawsuit & jail time would have been quite a downer though.

Bear said...

He forgot to mention that I originally acquired Brady in that first trade with Alexander

Seymour said...

i dig the title of the game... I am going to write my side of the story on my blog... eventually

The Sports Bottle said...

Why did you do your own blog anyways?