Monday, September 15, 2008

...Like a Candle in the Windmill


YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! I don't think I've been (or for that matter the entire sane part of Wisconsin, which isn't really that many, but still) so happy over someone losing thier jobs in my entire life. This shit spread like wildfire in the matter of minutes. My brother gets a call from some dude that heard it on the radio, he calls me, it had been posted as a small item on brewers.com like 3 minutes earlier, I get a text from Bear, I text others. About two minutes later, I went to JSOnline.com, which got fucking crushed by the amount of traffic and the Brewer Blog was shut the fuck down.


10 Quick Q's and Answers on the managerial change:


Is Svuem any better? I doubt it.


Is he any worse? Quite possibly, but the IQ of your average baseball player isn't that high (i.e. lighting shoestrings on fire, shaving cream pies, and "the cold shoulder") so they might not even realize they have a new manager.


How will this affect the team? I certainly hope they realize that they are fucking next if they don't make the playoffs, so it will either light a fire and catapult them into the playoffs, or they will play scared and finish 0-12.


Who made this decision? I have to think Attanasio did. He knows he is going to be wasting money for the next few years as we go into "mini-rebuilding". I can only assume the listless play of the last few days FINALLY sealed it.


Who's next? Melvin is on a short list if his players don't get in. This was clearly a message that big Mark is done taking shit.


Can Svuem teach 95% of a major league roster how to hit anything but a fastball? Next question.


Can Svuem teach 95% of a major league roster how to bunt a runner over? Not in 13 days.


Does Svuem have any secret love affairs with players ala Yost-"Bushie"-"Cappy"-"Shousie"-"Rickie"-"queer Canadian dude" that we should know about? Svuem does not approve of that type of lifestyle.


Why Svuem? Is he even qualified? Ummm.....Are you fucking serious? I am more qualified.


Who would have been a better candidate? If you are asking who would turn the team around in two fucking weeks, I'm thinking potentially Buddha or Jesus Christ, but Christ can't hit a slider either. Otherwise, its probably too late.


Will the Brewers make the playoffs? Boy, I just don't see how. I don't think firing the manager at this point is going to make them forget how shitty they have been for two weeks. Unless Svuem is a helluva motivational speaker, or he has one of those cardboard cutouts of Mark Attanasio like on "Major League", except that you put pieces of clothing back on. Then maybe. The move is better than nothing. I certainly approve. But it is sort of like drinking a case of beer, and deciding to drive 10 miles home, only to roll your car over the top of a pedestrian with two blocks left....and THEN calling a cab.

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