Saturday, March 6, 2010


Yesterday about 5 p.m., you would have thought that Ted Thompson took a dump on Curly Lambeau's statue, and wiped his ass with the American flag.

Free agency had started. The Packers had not held a gun to Chad Clifton's head and demand that he sign whatever they offered him therefore giving up the chance to check to see if he could cash in one last time. Clearly, Thompson did not utilize the Jack Bauer strategy of kidnapping Clifton's family and threatening their lives if he did not stay in Green Bay. It was obviously Thompson's fault for letting Clifton hit the open market, because the player has no choice in the matter.

Not only that but OMFG! The Bears paid an aging (pretty freakishly athletic, but still aging) 4-3 Defensive end, who doesn't like to work very hard, 6 years, 91.5 million with $42 mil guaranteed. Obviously, Thompson should have offered him $100 mil to play a position he had never played before! Either that or had him killed so that the Bears couldn't overpay him.

Then, Detroit went out and signed Kyle Vanden Bosch! And Nate Burleson!! They are going to win the Super Bowl!! And the Bears also signed a backup running back! GASP!

It was seriously panic on sports radio. Thompson had no plan, Chicago and Detroit were not going to lose a game except when they play each other. He Who Shall Not Be Named will be back, and the Vikings will be 12-4 (losing only to the Bears and Lions), the Pack was going to trot out Breno Giaciomini (sp) at left tackle, Rodgers was going to get injured in week one, and we traded away Brian Brohm and OMFG Matt Flynn is going to be our starter and we will go 0-16. This was all based on the fact that a 36 year old LT with bad hips and bad knees was going to visit Washington.

Oh, and overnight they signed Clifton to a 3 year, $20 mil deal. Seriously. Calm the fuck down. I would enjoy the Pack making a splash. But they will be fine. Ted has a plan, and he is working his plan. You (Packer fan) are not on the phone listening to what is going on. You can't just give the players everything they ask for without negotiating anything. If you did that, you would be the Washington Redskins. Or the Bears I guess. It will be fine. Have a can or 15 of Busch Light. Smoke some cigs. Eat some fried cheese. The Packers are still going to be fine. I will let you know when to panic.

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