Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Def Con 3

I am in pure panic mode.

My sports betting funds have run out. I lazily placed some bets over the past month or two but wasn't into it very much anymore. But I'm rejuventated by March Madness and would like to blow about a hundred bucks over the next couple weeks. But those Nazis over at MasterCard have decided to decline all transactions related to gambling websites. So I'm freaking out. I am on the phone with these assholes as I speak. I have a credit limit of $27,000 and an account balance of $0.00. Seriously, float me a hundy.

So, I'm now off the phone. I called, gave all the required passwords and secret answers and they still informed me they will not approve the transaction. FUCK YOU, YOU STUPID BITCH. At least learn how to speak English correctly before you tell me to go screw myself! Does my call go directly to New Dehli or something?

I have one last ditch effort that will hopefully come through before the games start tomorrow morning.


Juicelaw said...

Dude. Can't you just find a different credit card? Authorize this alleged off shore casino to withdraw the money directly from your checking account? Join an office pool like every other soccer mom on the planet?

By the way. That was funny as shit.

It is 6:30 a.m. (4.5 hours prior to tipoff) and I just checked March Madness On Demand on my office computer to make sure it works. It does.

JM said...

If I quit my job this morning, can I just make a Costanza-like return on Monday and pretend it never happened? My back is to the room so MMOD won't fly... I'm stuck with the radio.

And I was recently able to get onto Bodog and open an account, using a CC I believe.

Juicelaw said...

I would go the Office Space route.

"I was told I could listen to the radio at a reasonable level"

Juicelaw said...

And you have my permission to make Thursday through Sunday "The Weekend of George"

JM said...

Unfortunately I don't get great reception down in Storage Room B.

Bear said...

With my St Patty's Day mild hangover, lack of sleep, and basketball on all day, I SERIOUSLY considered calling in sick, but I don't have any sick days, cuz businesses are gestapo's and they destroy your will to live.

That is all!

The Sports Bottle said...

It is correct Bodog will take a CC, but not a Mastercard. Believe me, I've tried. I then went out and put some money in a prepaid Visa card only to find out it can only be used in the United States, and these sites aren't exactly in the United States. And it will take too long for me to get an actual new credit card. So I'm gonna use a PayPal-like site to send the money but it takes up to one business day, making this the longest goddamn business day ever.

JM said...

Oh, yes... I recall now. I have a Mastercard CC and a Visa debit I never use and had to bust it out for that.

Juicelaw said...


I think we need to have an intervention. I can feel you shaking.