Getting a Running Start....

I am finally recovered enough from my weekend that I can at least form coherent thoughts. I would be thrilled to recap the weekend for you, however a) I don't remember much, b) I have been asked by certain other parties not to reveal certain weekend themes and c) Some of the shit that was discussed was inappropriate enough that I am uncomfortable putting it down on "paper".

For instance, I think it is safe to say that the theme/quote of the weekend was "Getting a Running Start". However, I am not in a position to explain where that came from because it could cause some embarrassment.

Overall, we had a great time, got SUPER fucked up, ate a whole bunch of shit that is bad for us, and the weekend was pretty much one great big gay joke.

BREW CREW HANGOVER

Holy shit, the Brewers might never lose again. And Rickie Weeks got severely injured a year too late.

If I was the Brewers, here is what I would do: This injury gives them a golden opportunity/excuse to call up Escobar and to give him a look at either short or 2B to see if he really is too good to not use. The same is true with Gamel, who is already up, and whose haircut hit a homer last night. It is a golden opportunity, because there is some excess playing time available, and it can be done with very little hurt feelings. Gamel can get into a platoonish thing with Hall/Counsell/Hardy? at 3B, Escobar with Hardy/Counsell/Hall at SS and Hardy/Counsell/Hall at 2B. You could also think about spot starting Gamel at 1B or outfield if his bat is that good. Right now, you have the opportunity to play both Gamel and Escobar a few times a week under those scenarios, and get them some experience. Then, if they are too good to sit, you can try to trade Hall (fucking impossible), Hardy (unlikely) or Fielder (even more unlikely) for some pitching down the stretch. Or, if they are too young or to bad, you can trade one of the prospects, or send them down for more seasoning. I have a hard time believing weeks was going to hit 50 HRs and hit .275, so I don't feel like we've lost that much in the long run.

HE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED

Are we fucking serious right now? Really? Here is the timeline yesterday:

8 a.m.: He is definitely not coming back and this is all total bullshit (via Bus Cook, through Hattiesberg newspaper)

12 p.m.: He is having surgery Tuesday with Dr. James Andrews and is definitely playing this year for the Vikings barring some unforeseen complication. (via St. Paul newspaper)

5 p.m.: He is not having any kind of surgery ever, he is going to try to rehab, and if all works out he is definitely playing for the Vikings this year, and he has never heard of Dr. James Andrews. (via Eddie Werder).

8 p.m.: He eats a small child.

In 12 hours, that is THREE COMPLETELY OPPOSITE STORIES!!!!! How are people not getting fired over this???? We can't believe ANYTHING, ANY news organization says EVER. This is unfuckingbelievable.

-I'm probably going to fake live blog a Brewer/Twin game either Friday or Saturday because I'm fucking bored and lonely.

PS. The Twins suck my nutsack.