Exhale

Well there we go. Yo is a Cy Young contender and the Crew is sure to turn this 7 game losing streak into a 12 game winning streak after yesterday. Championship! Thus is the ebb and flow of the 700 game MLB season. I'm still concerned that the Crew hasn't hit at all for the last week. Big early season game today. They sort of need to steal this series after shitting Houston down their legs. Gotta score more runs though. Headed to the Keg on Wednesday afternoon for a game against the Padres. Headed down with my old man and his union cronies. No word on whether legs will be broken or not.

NBA PLAYOFFS

I find it incredible that no NBA team has EVER come back from a 3-0 deficit. If the Lakers demise is a foregone conclusion, then why are we wasting our time even playing game 4. There should be a rule that series are a best of 7, until a team wins the first three, then it is a skunk, and it is over. While I'm not the biggest NBA fan, I do follow it, and watch portions of games here and there. But I won't be going out of my way to watch any more games in this series until it gets to 7. Why bother?

GOLF

I finally got out for 18 yesterday. I'm not very good. 110 on 18 holes isn't getting me to the PGA tour. But considering I haven't touched a club in at least 8 months (Wisconsin weather rules) it could've been worse.

MOVIE REVIEWS

Watched a couple of older-ish movies from my DVR that I hadn't seen before.

"Youth in Revolt": I enjoy Michael Cera even though he plays the same character in every movie/TV show ever. I just find that character funny. Zach Galifianakis and his beard were in the movie as a alcoholic truck driver that is banging Michael Cera's mom. Steve Buschemi and trailer parks were also involved. I enjoyed the movie. I would recommend it, but I doubt I would stop to watch it again if it was on cable.

"The Hurt Locker": Supposedly won an Oscar. I'm a little Iraq movied out to be honest. There have been something like 10 million movies made about this, which I guess makes sense since this "war" has been going on for 10 years. It was a solid movie, but not very unique. It is an Iraq war movie. No idea why or how this won (or was nominated, I don't watch that shit) an Oscar. It is worth watching if you like desert war movies. I wouldn't watch it again.

BEERS OF THE WEEKEND

Lienenkugel Limited: Kind of dog shit. A cross between Leinie's original, which is awful, and Honey Weiss. Don't bother. Thank (Sports Bottle's) god I only drank one. I'm not sure what the idea behind "limited" was. I can tell you one thing, it will be limited to one in my stomach.

New Glarus "Two Women": Not as good as it might sound. It should be called "Two naggy ass fat women". New Glarus is always a conundrum to me. They make some absoultely delicious beer: "Fat Squirrel", "Spotted Cow", "Totally Naked", 'Back Forty Bock". And some really, really bad beer. This one would be in the second category for me.

I'm off to get fat at brunch. Peace.

Perspective From The Afterlife

I'm coming straight at you from the right hand of Sports Bottle's god to spout some overreaction, and maybe some glass half-full stuff after my heart exploded in the last two minutes yesterday.

I think I'll start with the negatives since I find myself able to write much lengthier recaps when the Packers lose. It really is amazing how little I have to write about when we win. I've probably already written more today than I had in the last five weeks. Does that make me negative? Maybe. I just think I don't have access to blow the players like the real media does, so it would seem to be a huge waste of everyone's time for me to pat anyone on the back. ANYWAYS

-Jarrett Bush. I mean, seriously. Why is he not playing for the Tennesee Titans? He is incapable of playing corner. Partially due to injuries and I presume partially due to the fact that Pittsburgh ran the Houston Oilers offense from the late 80's, Bush was on the field the entire game. He single handedly cost us 10 points. Both of the long catches he gave up were inexcusable. He completely stopped running on the first one. Both times, he had no clue where the ball was, and it was in the air for roughly 45 seconds. So frustrating. At a minimum you should be able to make a play on the ball with both of those passes. I just don't understand how you let a receiver run past you after 15 seconds. Usually when a guy gets beat, someone else is at least partially to blame. But on both of those passes, it seemed pretty clear that Bush was manned up on the guy.

-Mason Crosby. I'm trying to come up with a good corollary here if he still has a job by Monday afternoon. George Bush did a pretty terrible job at president for a while there (8 years). Matt Millen in Detroit? I think that is a pretty good one. Ned Yost? A 34 yard field goal is nearly automatic in the NFL. Thompson should have been on the horn during the game looking for a new kicker, because Dallas is probably also looking for one this week. I think that he is 1/3 responsible for the loss. I realize that it seems funny to say, and probably a stretch given everything that happened, but that FG was HUGE. There is no way there isn't someone on the street that can hit a 34 yarder 90+% of the time. It is so bad now that I really believe we are better off going for it on almost all 4th downs. That I was sure we would lose if we didn't score a TD on that last drive. I'm going to write my congressmen or something. His ineptitude is getting out of hand.

-503 YARDS???? I mean wow. We couldn't cover ANYONE. We sat in zone, and he destroyed us. We blitzed and Big Ben would break two tackles, locate Bush, and hit a wide open receiver. It was sick. Did the Steelers expose our secondary? Also, the Psycho defense doesn't work against future Hall of Fame QBs, I think we've settled that. Woodson had his worst game of the season by far. I don't believe the referees helped anything. A.J. Hawk and B.J. Raji are not capable of guarding Heath Miller.

-8 carries??? I dislike Ryan Grant. A-Rodg is awesome, and the passing game was unstoppable. So it is hard to complain about the offense. But we ran the ball less than 10 times. In an NFL game. Perhaps we could have kept that ball out of the Steelers hands? I'm pretty much nit picking.

THE POSITIVES?

-A-Rodg. May have been better than the guy that threw for 503 yards. He also torched a top 5 defense. He was amazing. Somehow, some asshole on a radio call in is going to blame him for "not winning in the 4th quarter".

-Jermichael Finley. Even though he wears a disturbing jersey (child size small, name on the back is 1/4 the size of everyone else's), he is really, really good.

-36 points. We did plenty enough to win on offense. I don't think there is any doubt how good the offense is when Rodgers isn't getting killed.

-Clay Matthews. The guy is incredible. 10+ sacks in his rookie year. And he clearly got hosed out of another one.

The Pack refuses to make this easy on anyone. Just when it looked like they were a shoo-in for the five seed, everything went wrong this weekend. If the Giants win tonight, we have a bit of a mess on our hands. We should beat Seattle handily next weekend, but there are no guarantees. Arizona now officially has nothing to play for, so we are getting Leinart in week 17. So we are still in pretty good shape.

I'm not sure you can be that broken up about losing to the Steelers on the last play of the game on a semi-miraculous throw and catch. I just hope the defensive performance was a blip in an otherwise great season. Ben R. was having a pretty great year, so it wasn't like it was completely out of the question for him to play well, I just wasn't really expecting to lose a game that we scored 36 points in. I still think we are OK. As long as we get rid of Crosby.

The Bills have it out for us

According to a tweet from Jason La Canfora, "Bills to sign T Jamon Meredith from Packers practice squad. Both teams could use a tackle, actually."

So what does this mean exactly? Was Jamon Meredith the answer to our offensive line issues? No probably not, but since he was affiliated with our team and we have had issues at OT already, wasn't it worth keeping him around? As Aaron Nagler, writer at Cheesehead TV claims, "It was more important to Thompson to keep 3 fullbacks than to elevate an OT from the practice squad?...".

I'd have to agree with the guy on that point, which of course is now moot because I don't believe there's anything that can be done once the two sides agree to a deal, Meredith is now a Bill.

Prognosis Negative

* On Collins: Has clavicle sprain. Will see how he is on Wednesday. Too early to give prognosis.

Can anyone explain to me what the above sentence means? I'm far from being a medical doctor, but I was under the assumption that the clavicle was a bone. Better known as the collar bone? How the fuck do you sprain a bone?

I'm still unhappy. And I'm still overreacting. And I completely forgot to trash Jarrett Bush. TWO false starts on punts? Really? Seems to me that the extra .2 seconds as a gunner on a punt isn't going to make that big of a difference. Fuck is that frustrating.

Not Good At All

There is nothing more likely to ruin a perfectly good week heading up to Oktoberfest, and nothing more likely to lead to a completely unproductive week at work, and a little extra blackout, than the Packers shitting down their leg on the Sunday before to an inferior team (probably).

I realize that last sentence was really like 4 sentences, but fuck you, and fuck everyone on the Packers "defense" except for Charles Woodson. And Woodson probably blatanly gave up an easy touchdown, but also had 2 picks, one for a TD, and like 43 tackles. I'm pretty sure that if tackles were an official NFL stat, he would have set some kind of record. And it isn't a good sign when a smallish corner easily leads your team in tackles. Also, it isn't a good sign when many of those were around the line of scrimmage, meaning that he so easily read run that the plays weren't even masked, and yet nobody else could get near the ball. Our front seven got DOMINATED by the Bengals.

Also dominated? Our offensive line. One guy had FIVE sacks? Also, A-Rodg had somewhere between .1 seconds and 1 second to throw every single pass. And yet nobody was open. And when the receivers were open, and Rodgers managed to find them, they dropped it (at least 5 drops). And I'm not letting A-Rodg off the hook either. Fucking throw the ball away. He takes so many sacks, it is frustrating. One bit of credit, at least he doesn't do what our old QB did and throw it into coverage instead of taking a sack.

Also, Ryan Grant is still below average.

And Mason Crosby is well below average at this point. Can we bring in a free agent for a look? I've got NO confidence in him at this point. And I bet he doesn't have much either. I'm not saying you need to make every 50 plus yarder to take. But 50% would be nice. And at least tease me with a possible make instead of being so far wide that it hits McCarthy in the face, who was somehow standing behind him. That was just a poor effort.

So yeah. Not good. Not sure what to even think about it. Maybe Cincinnati is good? I mean, they should be 2-0 right now. Of course, the Packers should be 0-2. On the bright side, we are playing possibly the worst team in the league next week in St. Louis. But I don't know how we could be favored right now to be honest. Don't we need to win a home game against a team that on paper we should have destroyed? Because if we don't win most of these early games, our schedule doesn't get any easier, and we are going to have a helluva time getting to 9 or 10 wins.

Also, Nick Barnett can suck my cock. Of course you got booed for doing your samuri dance after making a routine tackle (your first of the fucking game by the way), after you had already let the Bengals drive like 60 yards for the game winning FG. Fucking make the tackle and go back to the huddle. For all the shit Packer fans take, they are pretty fucking forgiving, but if you fuck up enough, they are going to let you know it. (And they aren't as white trash as Cowboy fan who screamed through the entire National Anthem last night. Fucking idiots).

At least we are now about 101 hours from Oktoberfest.

Interesting Things

I was all set to write up a post bitching about how Peter King (and others) have picked the Bears to be in the Super Bowl. That is despite the fact that Cutler's liver will surely explode at some point this season due to binge drinking and diabetes. And the fact that he is a gigantic douche that will get mad at Matt Forte for scoring all the touchdowns or something and refuse to throw him the ball to make a point. Or the fact that there are no discernible wide receivers on the team to throw to. Or the fact that their secondary was awful last year. Or the fact that Brian Urlacher is without a doubt the most overrated player in NFL history. Or the fact that the offense they run is so pedestrian, that it doesn't really matter who plays QB.

But then I listened to a BS Report podcast from last week. And Mike Lombardi from the National Football Post and the NFL Network picked the motherfucking Green Bay Packers. Which I was both surprised and delighted by. And this pick was made BEFORE the first team beat down the Pack put on Arizona. At the very least, a Super Bowl prediction by a respected journalist leads me to believe that the Packers should be a very, very good team.

It is a good thing that Peter King is not a respected journalist, because that would mean the Bears will be good too.

On a side note, I haven't heard anyone predict either the Viqueens or the Lions in the Super Bowl, meaning both are going to gargle cock all year.

On another side note, the Packers/Bears game on September 13th (that I have tickets to) is a de facto NFC Championship game.

On a third side note, the game tonight against the Titans is going to be boring as shit. I hope to (Sports Bottle's) god that Matt Flynn plays tonight. Because I would have to get pretty goddamn drunk to enjoy 3.9 quarters of Brian Brohm throwing passes to the other team.

Let's Rationalize

Now that my blind fury has passed, and I was able to avoid most of whatever bullshit was coming out of that lying fucks' mouth. I though I would take a deep breath, and discuss the actual ramifications for your 2010 NFC North Division Champion Green Bay Packers.

I realize that a rational argument could also be made for the opposite of this, or that tomorrow he will cry and change his mind again, but I only have the mental capacity for this line of positive thinking.

This signing is going to fuck our friends to the west in the following ways:

1) Chilly isn't smart enough to utilize whatever is left in His tank, and obviously doesn't have the balls to stand up against Him, meaning He is going to do whatever the fuck he wants. Which is throw it all over the fucking place. The strength of the team is A-Peter, and Chilly was too dumb not to give him the ball 400 times last year. Imagine what he'll do now. Does anyone remember the Ray Rhodes era? How about the Mike Sherman era? Remember how well it went when we had a coach that didn't stand up to him? Anyone remember 2005 when Darrell Bevell was his QB Coach and he threw 29 interceptions in a 4-12 season?

2) It is going to take 5 to 10 carries per game away from A-Peter, which is fantastic for Queen opponents. This is regardless of what play is called, because you know that there will be a shitload of run to pass audibles.

3) Whatever they may gain in total yardage due to more passing, they will lose in more turnovers, and less third down conversions on a whole. The rationale: A-Peter is a virtual guarantee to get you 3 to 5 yards on every carry. While he does fumble, the chances of a running back fumbling are far less than a QB throwing a pick on third down. Also, the chances of a completion for a first down regardless of yardage is probably around 50 or 60%, which makes the chances of getting nothing 40 to 50%. The chances of a first down run on 3rd and 5 or less are probably a little higher, and the chances of getting nothing are lower. Of course, some of the passes will go to A-Peter, but ask Ryan Grant how many times he was hung out to dry on a last second flip pass, only to turn around and get decleated by a linebacker.

4) They still have zero WRs. Donald Driver, on the downside of his career, would still be the number one in Queenland.

5) The locker room is going to be destroyed.

6) Seriously, Chilly is an idiot.

7) I think you can pencil in He for 20 to 25 TD, and 15 to 20 INT. Traveiouereueos and Sage would've given you 15 to 20 TD and 10 to 15 picks. And an extra 150 touches for A-Peter, arguably the best player in the league.

And if all of the above doesn't come true, well, then I'm going to start filling bags of urine right now, in the hopes of giving one to each and every fan at Lambeau on November 1, to do what they please.

Wow, big Brewers news

Holy cow! So I guess JJ Hardy has been sent down to Nashville and Alcides Escobar has been called up to the big leagues? That is the news according to JSOnline. Is this move indicative of an upcoming trade? There's been a lot of rumors since they put Hardy up on waivers, mostly involving the Red Sox, but he hasn't fully cleared yet, which is basically what it would take for the Sox to get a claim in on him.

At the same time Bill Castro has been fired as pitching coach and replaced the mother fuckin Boz, Chris Bosio. I have fond memories of him and Teddy Higuera tearing shit up late 80's, early 90's style. No idea if he's a good coach or not though, time will tell.

UPDATE: The axe just swung again as Bill Hall is being DFA, which, with no options left, means one of three things, he can be claimed by a team (haha no fucking way), he can accept a minor league assignment(most likely what will happen, I suggest the Timber Rattlers) or he will be outright released if he declines an assignment to the minors. So basically the same thing as two weeks ago, not really news. Also they called up some french guy to replace him. Oh non!

Miami Is Burning II: Attack of the Fatty Tumor

I totally forgot about Prince "Fatty Tumor" Fielder last night! He had given everyone so little to complain about this season (and really, he still hasn't), but last night he reappeared in all his glory. First and second, nobody out, and he decides out of the blue to try to steal fucking third base. It was totally the Willie Mays Hayes slide on Major League where the guy at third was waiting with the ball (except he didn't come up short on the slide).

THEN, in the midst of the Great Miami Fire of 2009, he let an easy grounder go through the wickets, that cost the Crew at least one, if not two runs.

In non Fatty Tumor related news, in that same Great Miami Fire of 2009, Braun and Cameron were both removed for injuries. If either is serious, that one single inning could have turned the entire Brewer season around.

PS. SportsBottle travels to every U.S. city at least once per year. And somehow fits in time for two week vacations to the tropics, keeping the streets safe from crime, and beating the bishop three times a day. He is an amazing human being.

PPS. So are we still going to Vegas October 22nd?

PPPS. Oh yeah, brother, I forgot to mention we definitely aren't going Labor Day anymore. SportsBottle managed to find one day out of the year that he can't get off.

My Sincerest Apologies

I know I've said at least five other times that I wasn't going to discuss this anymore, but why fight it? It is something that I have an opinion about that I feel is an insightful one in that I probably spend somewhere between 25 and 98% of every single day thinking about the Green Bay Packers. This issue affects the Green Bay Packers. Also, I feel that the tide of opinion has sufficiently been turned within the two people in this blog audience that this won't turn into a he said he said bitch fest. I truly believe that what may be about to happen would leave any Packer fan to have only one thought. And although I sort of thought that last year too, this year is a whole shitload different. So I am treating this more of a get together to get some things off my chest and to allow anyone else that cares to agree with me. Maybe all this shit that is coming out is untrue, and He will either go away, or sign a one-day deal with Green Bay and retire. Alot of this has to play out yet, so this is an obvious overreaction. But if we are being realistic here, I think we all know where this is going. I am trying to separate this in to semi-coherent sections:

1) He doesn't give a fuck about His legacy with the Green Bay Packers and he is a terrible human being.

This is obvious, and cannot be argued. Scott or Bonita or Deanna or Britney Favre or Bus Cook or whoever the fuck is leaking his shit these days has said that the only reason he wants to come back is to "stick it to the Packers." Which means that unequivocally he is a fucking asshole. And if he thinks that ANYONE in Green Bay would cheer for him if he shows up to Lambeau in a Viking uniform, he is a bigger moron that I've been giving him credit for.

An argument could be made that the Packers didn't handle their shit very well last year, and as a result, many fans were pissed. But the Packers had nothing to do with this possible shitstorm. He is intentionally trying to go to an rival.

2) He is not that good any more.

Two years ago, yeah, he was great. Last year? He threw like 20 INTs. He threw like 50% of his TD passes for the season in one game. He led his team to a losing record.

3) He is quite possibly injured.

4) He will be FORTY.

5) This signing would not make the Viqueens a Super Bowl contender.

I guess part of me should be rooting for this to happen, because it would wreck another year of Adrian Peterson's prime. Not that Treoiouarvarious Jackson is not terrible, or Rosemary Sagenfels is not average at best, but how does this make the Viqueens a title contender for the 12th straight year? Is He really a step up from Gus? Did they improve at all on defense? Other than the 5' 2" pothead they drafted from the WR goldmine that is Florida, did they gain any receivers? I've got some news for Viqueen fan. Even with A-Peter, your offense is NOT much better than the Jets was last year. Jones/Washington was a good backfield, Coles/Cotchery/Keller is better than the Viqueens receiving core. The Jets had at least as good of an offensive line. He is no longer capable of putting a team on his back, which is what the Queens would need him to do, because they have no receivers.

Beyond all that, Brad Childress is quite possibly the worst coach in the NFL, and He will be allowed to ignore A-Peter and wing it up 45 times a game.

Is Minnesota a division contender no matter who is at QB? I think so. But adding that prick and a few more picks to the locker room isn't going to make them that much better.

6) When will the media stop sucking his dick?

He is outright lying to everyone. He unequivocally told Trent Dilfer NO when asked if he was thinking of coming back. And like two hours later, Scott or Bonita or Deanna or the ghost of Irv was leaking a story that he was meeting with Childress. Not only is he fucking the fans that worshipped him for 16 years, but he is fucking the media that is partially responsible for all this shit in the first place. Nobody at ESPN is willing to stand up and say, "You know what? This is a total bitch move on His part, and I'm not going to dignify anything he or that fucking snake Bus Cook says until he is wearing a fucking Viking uniform or not. Because he has done nothing but lie to our faces through text messages for the last five years." Instead, you get all these bullshit excuses about what a competitor he is. Fuck that.

I feel a little better now. I predict today he will hold a press conference from his tractor that he is not coming back, and then he will sign with the Vikings five minutes later, and then tell Chris Mortensen that he is not coming back while attending mini-camp for the Vikings.

Semi-Daily Brew Crew Hangover #12

The Brewers are on goddamn fire right now. Freaking Jeff Suppan was one bad pitch away from seven shutout innings. Other than Parra, the starting pitching has been pretty stellar. The bullpen has been basically unhittable since Hoffman showed up. Rickie Weeks is going to be the first player to hit .250 but bat .475 with RISP, and drive in 48 game winning RBIs. He is sort of the anti-Fielder right now (almost said Braun but my man-love for him runs too deep.). Speaking of Braun, did anyone see the ad for the win 12 tickets to Ryan Braun's private suite, with an appearance from Ryan Braun? The first thing that came to my mind was that he had the right to fuck anything that entered his "private suite". I probably need some help. Does anybody really have the feeling that this team isn't at least as good as last year?

I will be there on Saturday for my initial sojourn to Miller Park. Going to some tailgate thing with some of my wife's friends. $35 got us a ticket a T-shirt, beer, food, entry into a beer pong tournament and a bus ride from some bar to the game and back. I plan to be blacked out by the fourth inning.

It was a pretty great time for sports right around 9:30 last night. At that time, the Brewers were putting their comeback on in the 7th, and Chicago-Boston was going into OT number 3 in their American professional basketball playoff game. Since there was something going on the DVR, I couldn't utilize picture in picture, so I had to do old school switching back and forth. My finger was getting numb and I'm pretty sure my wife passed out from an epileptic seizure. That was a fucking fantastic basketball game. Very few NBA games do it for me, but that one did. Especially since Boston lost. I fucking hate Boston. It occurred to me as the game was happening how far off the radar the NBA really is in the Juice household. My wife is pretty literate about sports and she expressed surprise that Joakim Noah was playing, because nobody thought it would be good in the NBA. She asked me who was good on Chicago because she thought they sucked. And my response was: Derrick Rose, and umm..John Salmons. I'm not even sure I know who John Salmons is. I've heard of him because I play fantasy basketball and very casually follow the league. But if he walked into my office right now wearing a John Salmons jersey, I wouldn't have any clue who he was. Oh, and before she asked who the good players were, she saw Rose make a good play and said "Jalen Rose? He still plays?" So yeah, we don't watch much NBA. But it was a pretty cool hour last night.

Semi-Daily Brew Crew Hangover #9

If someone had told me in February that 14 games into the season, Braden Looper would be our unquestioned best starting pitcher, I would have guessed our record would be 2-12. While we aren't far from that, I still don't think it is a great sign going forward. But Looper has been pretty impressive. He throws a strike on the first pitch almost every single time, which seems to be key to getting guys out because major league hitters rarely swing at the first pitch.

Mr. Coffey got another save, and while he didn't look great doing it, I still think he would be a serviceable closer if and when Hoffman dies of old age. Villa actually looked really good last night too. Is it just the pressure of closing or starting that he can't handle? Because his stuff was disgusting last night.

How do you go from giving up 11 runs one night, to nearly shutting a team out the next? And Philly didn't even threaten much until the ninth. If we can somehow coax a win out of "Bushie" today, it would be a huge, huge step in the right direction.

Afternoon games while I have nothing to do at work are great. I will be staring at my computer screen with the "Penske File" open on my desk and a pen in my hand between 12 and 3 today.

AS AN ASIDE:

Thompson got outbid by Syracuse for Paulus when he refused to give up a pair of free shoes and a helmet.

Semi-Daily Brew Crew Hangover #8

That wasn't a very good game again last night. I left to get my haircut for like 15 minutes, and Parra had given up 4 already. It almost wasn't even worth watching. And of course, while the game was just about to get away, I flipped over to Cavs/Pistons and got sucked in watching LeBron for like 5 minutes, and I missed the Hammer's homer. At least Braun seems to have gotten his head out of his ass. I'll take 4-4 w/ 2HRs all day. R.J. Swindle's debut didn't go so hot. Sure, he struck out Ryan Howard for his first career strikeout, and he got hosed on a couple of bad calls at the plate in the Utley at-bat. But that wild pitch and subsequent wild toss over home plate that cost another run wasn't too good. Swindle however has cemented in my head that if the world is ever so unfortunate that I bring a son into this world, I will tie his right arm behind his back and tie a weight around his left wrist and force him to be a submarining lefty. Swindle throws SIXTY FIVE for fuck sake. And he struck out 7 on 28 pitches in his last AAA appearance.

The Brewers suck hairy balls this year so far. My level of worry is about 6 out of 10. (And I know it is only April 22).

Semi-Daily Brew Crew Hangover #1

Well, here we are again. An opportunity to bitch and overreact about every loss in a 162 game season, and overreact and heap praise (and probably bitch) about every win. Clearly I have an inherent bias against Rickie Weeks (because he sucks) and Jeff Suppan (because he sucks). So know that going in. I'm not going to have much good to say about them. Weeks would have to win MVP and Suppan the Cy Young before they get any credit. Gone are arch nemises of the past: Geoff Jenkins, Matty Wise, Eric Gagne and Ben "Glass Joe" Sheets. And we can't forget Neddy Yost. So much my material is gone, although some of those on the list have been gone for more than a year, I still have occaisonal nightmares about Jenkins trying to hit a lefty, or Ned trying to execute a double switch.

So yesterday, I, like many others, was at "work" while Jeff Suppan was proving he was worth an opening day start. I assume Soup came out like gangbusters, buckling knees with his 82 mph fastball, and 81 mph change up, lets just check the box sc....What the fuck? 4 IP, 6 fucking ER? Jesus fucking Christ. And this comes against potentially one of the worst offenses in the league in one of baseball's least friendly hitting parks. It was 3 to fucking nothing before I even got a chance to put on gamecast yesterday. Unreal. And it wasn't like our other "options" proved to be any better. McClung walked 4 in an inning. Bush gave up a 2 run dong. Jorge gave up a blast on his first pitch. The hitting seemed to be fine, and we even chased Lincecum after THREE. (I'm pretending I didn't see Billy Hall hit into a double play with a guy on third and one out. Even though I mentally said it would happen because he hits in to a DP in that situation 94% of the time. Someone needs to do some research on that. Bear? You seem plenty motivated.)

I think I'm already starting to dislike Ken Macha. That decision to start Soup yesterday was not popular with anyone who knows anything about baseball. The theory to not start your best pitcher against the other team's best is retarded. In baseball, I think it is pretty fair to say that if the pitching matchup is close to equal, there is about a 50/50 chance to win every game. When one team puts their ace out there, their chances of winning generally go up, especially if they are facing a dogshit opposing pitcher. So yesterday instead of giving ourselves an almost even money chance to beat Lincecum by pitching Yo, we basically said, fuck it, we'll take our 25% chance with Soup, and hope to beat the other team's guy tomorrow with our best. We win that game yesterday with Yo, Parra or Looper. We put up six runs, and should win nearly every game with that output. Soup puts us at a disadvantage, and there is no way he is one of the best 25 players we have. How long of a leash do you think Macha gives him? If he does this for two more starts in a row, does he go to the pen? It's not like McClung showed anything today either, but he gives me a LITTLE confidence.

9:15 p.m. start tonight. I'll get home from work for the first pitch, and be out by the 3rd inning.

RANDOM VIDEO GAME STORY:

Game 1 of NLCS, Brewers at Cubs. Brewers take a 8-1 lead into the bottom of the 8th. Parra comes out of the bullpen (5th starter) and gets lit up for 4 in the 8th. Hoffman comes in and give up a pair of 2 run bombs to Aramis and Soto (walk off) and Brewers lose 9-8. I couldn't sleep that night.

The First "Dom"ino?

So word is that the Pack has finally hired someone to be defensive coordinator, and that someone is Dom Capers. I'm satisfied with that selection. Statistics say he was the best choice all along, and he is definitely a proven commodity as a defensive coordinator. It is unknown whether he will run a 3-4, 4-3, hybrid 3-4/4-3 or a 2-2-7 (the only defense the Packers have the personnel to run). But I think what makes me the most excited is that with the hiring of a coach that could run a 3-4, could come the signing of a freak of an athlete named Julius Peppers, who wants to play in a 3-4. Capers gives the Packers the scheme, to go along with the piles of money lying around that they have to sign him. History does not suggest Ted Thompson will actually pull the trigger on this. But at this point, Green Bay has to be the favorite, don't they? All of this assumes Carolina doesn't give Peppers the middle finger and franchise him. However, Carolina supposedly has to choose between Peppers and all-world left tackle Jordan Gross (one will be a free agent). So if they franchise Peppers, I say we sign Gross.

The moral of this whole story is that Dom Capers is the first piece to the puzzle that is going to lead to a Super Bowl title next year.

Witch's Titty

It is frigid as fuck outside right now. -17 degrees (not counting the wind chill). I realize that 90% of the people reading this (at least) are dealing with similar problems. It is getting to the point where my vehicle is being adversely affected even after it has been driven for 30 minutes. You want to know what else is cold? The fucking Wisconsin Badgers. That shit last night was an abomination on so many levels. The blueprint to beat Bucky was laid out last night: 1) use a trapping, full court press, 2) make circus shots for 15 straight minutes, 3) force the Badgers to shoot under 25%. Do all that and you can beat the Badgers in Madison. I really, really like Bo Ryan, and kills me to say what I'm about to say. I think he SUCKS at adjusting during the game. He relys on his "system", and thinks that if the Badgers just look down and run their swing, that eventually the other team will get frustrated and make mistakes. And it usually works. It worked for most of the game last night too. But sometimes you have to adjust your game a bit. Like when the other team is trapping your point guard full court. I'm no coach, but I've watched/played enough basketball to understand that the way to break a press is not to let your point guard get trapped 25 feet from mid court, and have the other 4 guys stand underneath the basket waiting for him to dribble by and start the offense. Fucking pass the ball before you get trapped, if they over pursue, beat them deep, it isn't fucking rocket science. We were able to break a press in 6th grade, with the worst team on planet earth. Fuck! That wasn't the only reason they lost. The other was that once they broke a press, their inability to not have every layup/dunk blocked in the last 5 minutes (at least 5 of them). Or when they could run offense, passing it around for 30 seconds, and then have Hughes try a driving layup through 4 defenders, or a contested 3. On top of that, the Goophs were possessed on offense, making every backwards layup they threw up, and every 3 they needed to make in the last minute. It was really a perfectly shitty storm, but that press break is not excusable. Minnesota is far more talented, but Wisconsin is a better "team". If UW doesn't figure this kind of stuff out, Michigan St. will win by 40 if they trap. This is the kind of loss that could completely destroy thier season, when they look back two months from now and are 5-10 in the Big Ten.

Wow, that was a long paragraph.

Friday Night Lights is BACK tonight!

More Impatience

I would just like to follow up my agreement with everything in the last post (except that if they lose to the 0-15 Lionesses, I want McCarthy's ass on a platter), with another local sports radio rant. There has been a constant, and by constant I mean coincidentally the same percentage of people who disapprove of the fact that A-Rodg was our starting QB from day one, stream of people bitching about how "A-Rodg can't win the big game" or that "he doesn't come through in the clutch". Well, I would like to go ahead and call bullshit on that, and here is why. First, he has played in 14 full games now. Find me a QB with 14 career games that wins every time he gets the ball with under 2 minutes. Second, he doesn't call the plays. Sure, he has some liberties I imagine with audibles and such, but on a whole, he isn't the one calling draw plays. Third, last I checked there are 10 other players on offense. So when the left side of the O-line decides not to block, or Jermichael Finley drops a pass on one of the great plays designed for him, it really isn't A-Rodg's fault. Fourth, he doesn't play defense or special teams. There are three games that I can think of off the top of my head (and I'm sure there are more) (at Min, Car, Hou) where he lead the team down the field for a score, and either special teams (missed FG, 2 long KO returns v. Car) fucks up, or the defense allows a march down the field for the winning score. In the Minnesota and Carolina games he did it TWICE, only to have one of the other groups fuck it up.

So chill out on finding a reason to hate A-Rodg. He'll get there. Just be thankful he isn't one of the shitheads (Dilweg, Kiel, Wright, Whitehurst, Zorn, Risher, Tomczak) that played in the 80's and 90's. To the radio hosts credit, he went on similar rant and basically told people to "Leave Aaron Rodgers alone!" He really is the least of our problems.

PS. The fact that Nick Collins made the Pro Bowl should be investigated. Are the Packers and the NFC Pro Bowl team the only ones that use a Free Safety? That is about the only reason I could see (other than the randomness of this Darren Sharper like INT/Returns for TDs). The biggest snub on the Packers is clearly either Jermichael Finley or Justin Harrell. Also, the fact that a certain New York Jets QB made the squad despite leading the AFC in INTs is gay.

I'm not sure why I even care about the Pro Bowl rosters, because they stopped playing the Pro Bowl when I was 8.

Doom and Gloom

I went from celebrating a pretty darn good road trip in my head, to nearly crashing my car as I listened to the bullpen ruin a perfectly good day. I haven't heard any Yost comments yet, but imagine it sounded something like "Fuck you."

What the fuck happened to Guillermo Mota? Did Derrick Turnbow paint himself black? I'm not very happy about it.

Good news is there is a 10 game homestand against three shitty teams coming up. Anything less than 7-3 is a failure.

Don't Mess with Big Sexy

In the Rangers-Mariners game last night there was an epic beanball war. It ended when the Rangers pitcher fired a fastball at face level with Richie "Big Sexy" Sexson. Richie Sexson is 6' 10". Honestly, the ball was probably over the plate and not anywhere near hitting him in the head, but that didn't matter to "Big Sexy". He was going to kick him some pitcher ass (or something). The highest of high comedy was the helmet throw. Not as good as a jump kick, but pretty good. I would say he handled himself pretty well in the fight. Either way, it was a complete overreaction on his part. The mound being charged is a great tradition in baseball, along with chewing tobacco, crotch adjusting, and the Brewers loading the bases with one out with their 4 and 5 hitters coming up and not scoring any runs.


I guess the bottom line is this: I am exceedingly glad in hindsight that the Brewers sold him to Arizona for $7 on the dollar (at the time), and then that he signed an ungodly contract to hit 30 HR's, hit .214 and strike out 150 times a year with someone besides the Crew. Oh and I loved how he said that him throwing the helmet was "chicken shit".

Finally, the part I liked the least was that two players on my fantasy teams started this whole mess in the first place. When King Felix hit Gerald Laird. I generally discourage (fake) teammates from fighting each other, it causes bad vibes in the (fake) locker room. I probably need to cut Laird today.

State of the Brewers

This weekend was terrible, on a lot of levels for the Crew. The way they are playing has me thinking about what the long term effects on the team might be.

This team is built to win now. Or I should say WAS built to win now, because I think the injury to Gallardo is going to put a big dent in that.

Before I get to my apocalyptic predictions, I would just like to say that Gagne got fucking jobbed by the umps yesterday. I know, I know, we got a call earlier, all the bad calls balance out, blah, blah, blah. The bottom line is, Gagne threw 35 pitches yesterday, 18 of which were called strikes, 17 balls. At least 6 of those balls were changeups right down that middle that were strikes. You give a major league hitter an extra ball in an at bat, and they are going to make you pay. Was Gagne good yesterday? Obviously not, but he wasn't helped in any way shape or form by the shitty job at home plate, and it just might have cost them the game.

Now, onto my scorched earth theory:

Manager: I'm not sure if this is the manager or not. But if this team is so good, and so talented, why does it seem like they can never do any of the little things right. They aren't going to cut everyone on the team, so someone has to be blamed at some point, and that falls on Neddy. The powers that be hired Ted Simmons for the sole purpose to put pressure on Neddy, and it obviously hasn't worked. At some point, if things don't change in a hurry, the Brewers will have to rid themselves of their Yost infection.

Closer: Part of me doesn't think Gagne is as bad as everyone thinks. But, he's not doing the job he needs to. They aren't hitting well enough to not need a closer that is reliable, and Gagne probably isn't it. He has 9 saves, and 5 blown saves, which is far too many. He just seems to have awful luck. He doesn't really melt down per se, but he does just enough to give the other team a chance, which they can't afford. We need to give Mota a crack I think.

Bully: As a whole, the bully has been pretty solid (save for Tunrblow who is gone). Problem is, they have to pitch 4 innings every day that Sheets doesn't pitch. They are improved in this area.

Starters: Here is where things get interesting. I fear that this Gallardo injury could cause them to blow the whole thing up. The way I see it, one of two things are going to happen. a) They play pretty well, stay in the race, and make a move somewhere to get a decent starter; or b) They suck, trade Sheets for $.50 on the dollar. I think b) is more likely. What is the right answer here? If Sheets stays healthy, he will cost the Brewers way more than they can afford in free agency. But if they don't spend the money, I don't think they have the pitching in the long term to get to the playoffs next year. When healthy, he is a top 5 pitcher. But he has been extremely unreliable. If we suck and trade him away, we might never make the playoffs.

This is that never ending question in baseball, and that fine line that teams must tread: Do we blow all of our money and hope for the best? (Yankees/Red Sox) or Do we stay conservative, develop from within, and let our best players go when they hit their big payday? (Twins). I sincerely hope they don't go the way of the Twins before they even have the chance of getting their hearts ripped out in the first round like 5 times in 10 years (cheap Twins blast), but I have no hope that will actually happen. The worst case scenario here is: Sheets wins (or comes close to) winning the Cy Young, we lose the division by 5 games, lose Sheets in free agency, but probably should have traded him because we were never really in the race.

Hitting: Maybe we aren't as talented as I (and everyone else) thinks. Right now Braun, Fielder and Hart are the only players I trust at all to come through in the clutch, and even they are a little more inconsistent than I would like. It is too early with Cameron, and Kendall is fairly light hitting and slow, although he has been serviceable. The problem is that Weeks, Hardy and Hall have been fucking terrible. If there is one out and a guy on first, and one of those three are up, you might as well change the channel, because a double play is coming. It is a virtual guarantee. Hardy leads the league in 500 foot high infield pop ups, Weeks leads the league in strikeouts looking. So maybe those three aren't that good. Maybe they aren't the answer. Because they are killing them right now, and they always seem to find a way to kill a rally. Perhaps the answer is to trade one of them for a starting pitcher. Weeks is like a .220 career hitter and he is in the leadoff spot (which goes back to Neddy). On paper, we should be one of the most talented and feared hitting teams in the league, but in reality, if we aren't hitting home runs, we aren't winning many games.

Verdict: I have serious doubts about our long term chances with: Yost, Gagne, and the Hall/Hardy/Weeks triumvirate being so prominently involved.