Who's Next? And Other Stuff

At long last, the long national nightmare that was Jeff Suppan being part of the Brewer's roster is over.

I haven't been this excited about a roster move since we were cured of our Yost Infection a few years back. This was long, long overdue, and the delay seems to be more of a product of Soup being a nice guy than a person who throws baseballs. As my high school football coach once said, "You might be a helluva guy, but you're not much of a football player." Whatever, he will take home more than ten million more dollars, partially due to the inconceivable club option AFTER the four years are up, where the Crew has to pay $2 million MORE next year to buy him out. I just got a nice spot on the sidelines and bruises from holding tackling dummies.

The important thing to take away from this is. Who's Next? Who shall take the mantle from Jeff Suppan as my least favorite Brewer? Who shall I bitch about incessantly until he is gone? This is sort of tough. Most of the guys left are sort of likable, and even if they suck (Hoffman) it is hard to hate on them. I guess I will lean towards Macha because he makes some mind bending decisions at times (see letting Parra pitch 2 innings the day before he was supposed to start a few weeks back at Minnesota, and then having to call up your third choice from AAA due to travel issues; also see randomly bringing in Dave Bush to throw to one batter last night, and then pulling him after striking the guy out, which I should add worked, but was really dumb), and isn't all that likable. Even when he says "poppycock". To be determined I guess.

OTHER STUFF

-I thoroughly enjoyed the NBA Finals/Stanley Cup Finals/Brewer game going three way head to head last night. The Stanley Cup was the only game not that close. The NBA series has been almost wildly entertaining.

-The plot thickens on Brandon Underwood's case. Crusin' Chubby's fine name is now linked. I'm sure that two thirty something females met at a strip club from Milwaukee at some time between 2 and 4 am were just innocent, sober patrons. Vegas has just put 1 to 4 odds on these females being "entertainers". As an aside, this doesn't mean there wasn't a sexual assault. Perhaps something illegal did happen. And if it did, then Underwood is a piece of shit. I just tend to side with the NFL player in these cases because I cannot recall a famous athlete ever being convicted of sexual assault, even though many have been accused. Finally, let me point out that I am SHOCKED that at least 7 NFL players in their 20's were in Wisconsin Dells and went to Crusin' Chubby's. Who does that?

-I'm probably going to watch U.S.-England on Saturday from start to finish, and I may even blog about it. I think I would put the total number of soccer games I have watched from start to finish in my lifetime at ZERO. ESPN has finally brainwashed me.

-Finally, this article is a must read. And I'm totally going to order that book when it comes out. As far as you know, I didn't ghostwrite the entire article. As far as you know. For some reason I look forward to four 16 team conferences. Although that just means less automatic bids to the Get Together.

Choke Job

No, I'm not referring to how Bear and Loaf Cobra like to "get down". I'm actually referring to the Orlando Magic in Game 4 last night. Pretty great game if you like turnovers, missed free throws and shitty play, but it was close at least. And really, Orlando should have won that game, and should be up 3-1 right now. I'm going to pretend I care, and get all lathered up.

-How the fuck can you be in the NBA, and miss two straight free throws? When you are a choker. Howard missed two with 11 seconds left. Hedo missed at least two straight in the last minute, despite being an 80% FT shooter in the regular season. It is tough to shoot free throws with two hands around your neck.

-How the fuck does Stan Van Gundy ignore mountains of statistical evidence that says to HAVE to foul a team down by three in the closing seconds, to not allow them to even shoot the three. Not only that, but how do you not foul, and also decide not to guard them when the shoot the three? That was unfuckingbeleivable. I would be bitter if I was a fan of the Magic. No wonder he got shit canned from Wisconsin.

The series is now O-V-E-R. I refuse to waste time watching game 5. I might watch a 6 if it happens.

I actually set my DVR to watch Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals tonight. This is a personal first for me. I've got a shitload going on this weekend, and a shitload of yard work to do, so I have to do it tonight. The strange thing is that me, SportsBottle and the random dude that lives in my neighborhood who wears nothing but random hockey jerseys all year long, will be the only one's watching, so there is almost no danger of me starting the game on a two hour delay. My wife is NOT going to be happy about it. She'll get over it.

BREW CREW HANGOVER

Three straight to the Rockies? Really? There is no chance of them not getting destroyed by the White Sox this weekend. The AL is like 67-3 against the NL in interleague this year. Good news is that I just picked up Scott "I got robbed by Dontrelle Willis because he was an African-American pitcher for Rookie of the Year in 2003, and then realized I was 31 years old, and then died" Podsednik on one of my fantasy teams.

Finals Preview, Diets and iPhones

- I will force myself to watch every NBA Finals game because it is my duty as someone who calls myself a sports fan. Even though I suspect I won't like it much. I dislike the Lakers, and will be rooting for the Magic, but if I had to bet I would take the Lakers.

- My wife is out of town for work for the next two days. It gives us both an excuse to fuck up our diets and eat out. Of course, when she eats out, it is inevitably a salad. I am personally trying to go out of my way to gain all 30 pounds back in two days. Last night I got one of those Bread Bowl Pasta things from Domino's, and it was quite possibly the best 1400 calories I have ever eaten. I was physically ill afterwords, and it was great.

- SportsBottle, Ricky and any one else with an iPhone can shove them up their asses. I am getting a new phone in a few weeks, and would totally get an iPhone except that AT&T has deemed Green Bay not important enough to have 3G, and I'm not about to fuck around with worse than dial up cell phone Internet and pay an arm and a leg to do it. Plus, I already have two iPods, so alot of the point of the extra money would be wasted. But I do hope to be a faggot with Blackberry so I can do nothing but sit around and text/send emails/surf the internets at all social events, because everyone else does anyway, so why even bother fighting it.

-RE: Marlins comment. I won't argue at all about the history of the Marlins. They've done a shitload of cool things. But 1,000 people at a game. Fucking embarrassing.